Snake Boy Replies....

Snake Boy Replies and Civil War Breaks Out

Or..Back To The Future Part Four

Dear Squirrely Girl,

Wow I haven’t had this much interrogation since the feds shut down my Farmville. Well, let’s start with the tattoos. I really don’t understand the reason why one wishes to mark their carcass with all that ink. To me, body art mostly distracts from the God made natural beauty. I guess it is a way to “express” one’s self in a culture where criminal records and teenage pregnancy is “all the rage.”
When it comes to vampires, there is no explanation. I briefly participated in the whole pale man, bloodsucking, evil sorcery thing, but six months is all I could take of the Republican Party. 

There are plenty of reasons for remaking all the classics, because the classics suck in the eyes of the target consumer (aka pre-teen girls). My generation likes high definition, a lot of action, brief nudity, and a vampire or two. As far as originality goes in regards to television, the Jersey Shore beats Dallas right out of the park. Snooki would fist pump J.R. to death (yes I had to Google a Dallas pop culture reference because I have never heard of it). 

I have no comment of the music question. I don’t want to get on my soapbox about the constipated attempts of today’s “musical superstars.” 

We text the people sitting across from us because real human interaction scares the crap out of us. The world has never been so connected yet so far apart. It’s the irony of today’s society. I have yet to figure out how to be a nurse without being around people. . . . oy

Signed Snake Boy

Dear Snake Boy,

Well, my young whippersnapper/apprentice…I have to tell you I am a little worried about your generation’s future. I have been to the mountain, (figuratively, you know I am not climbing nothing) looked over it and I don’t like what I see at all, no sirree bob. You know what I see? Well, I will tell you what I see--I see a little civil war on the horizon--without Scarlett and the pretty dresses and big beautiful plantations being burned to a crisp--but a civil war just the same. I can talk to 10 people in one day and 5 will tell me their truth and 5 will tell me their truth and the two do not come anywhere close to being the same. Now you know how I hate math, but even in my simple little brain that equals, either one has it all right and the other has it all wrong OR they both have it a little right and a little wrong. But what do you think the chances are either side will admit that? Yeah, I got a better chance of filling out Dolly Parton’s rhinestone and sequins blouse.

My theory is we are heading for a secession of people with walking around sense from people who wouldn’t touch an open mind with a ten foot pole. Yep, I think you will wake up one morning and find a whole bunch of people living in the new country called “Mine All Mine”.  Their National Anthem will be “I Hear Ya Knockin’ But You Can’t Come In” and their bird will be a Parrot, because it will only repeat what they say so they will not have to ever hear an opposing opinion. In the nation of “Mine All Mine” they will pay no taxes, have no public anything. If you want it or need it, you will pay for it yourself because you must have a job in Mine All Mine. If you are too lazy to get a job you will not eat, it is that simple. Personal responsibility will be a requirement to live in Mine All Mine. That’ll teach the lazy bums living like parasites off hard honest workers. Of course if you happened to be one of those hard honest workers who happens to get sick and you can’t work, or you just get too old to work anymore…well…sorry but you will have to be deported to the ‘other’ country, “Try A Little Kindness”. 

It will not be exactly like the war between the north and south because these two countries do not want to be united so there will be little to no bloodshed---and because Mine All Mine will have all the guns and it is just no fun shooting people who don’t shoot back. 

As you can see there are pro’s and con’s to living in either country and it will be hard to decide which one you prefer—so there will be those handful of people who start another country called “Why Can’t We All Just Get Along”.  I don’t know where you will live. I am hoping they will create some sort of passport where you can move around a little and see what best fits your temperament.  But you will need to make a decision eventually because trust me on this one—we cannot continue to be a “United States”. Because it is not possible for people to live together and call themselves a country united when they are obviously a country divided forever.

IMHO ~ Squirrely Girl