Tattoos, Snakes, Vampires and Hip Hop

Welcome to the world of communication between an Aunt and a Great Nephew... Yes..We are both a little insane...

Dear Squirrely Girl:

Well, the day has finally come. Let’s be honest, you’ve been on God’s green earth a few years longer than myself. Now don’t get me wrong, you don’t look a day over 29, but you’ve had time to learn a thing or two about this crazy thing we mere mortals call life. I have come to the point in my life where I need a little wisdom and I believe the world out there could use a little too; and what better way for the world to hear some of your “walking around sense” than a good ole fashion blog.

Yes, I know Walter Cronkite is rolling over in his grave, but we have to adapt to the new world. We can exchange commentary of a wide range of topics from pop culture to politics. Of course like any professional news outlet, we must maintain a fair and balanced view on things. I will try my best to refrain from such things as calling Sarah Palin “Princess Chillbilly the Moose Molester” and you will have to be careful what you say about well just about everything.  And even though we will be heavily criticized, I do believe we will be rich and famous . . . but no matter how many mansions you end up owning or how many Victoria Secret models I end up marrying; at the end of the day we know that we have each other’s love and respect. Now that I have clarified everything, let the blogging begin. 

Signed
Snake Boy

Dear Snake Boy:

The whole political climate is certainly a hot bed of controversy right now…do we help sick people, do we kill them, do we just ignore them and hope they go away? Lots of stuff to talk about right there..for sure. BUT..you know what they say…never talk religion or politics. So we will make sure to discuss both in detail because that’s just how we roll.

But first things first, before I start wowing you with my intellect and extensive “know it all” attitude, I got some questions for your generation too, as a matter of fact I got a lot of questions. Here’s a couple:

Why do girls think tattoos are cool? When we were growing up the only people who had tattoos were pirates, sailors, and ex-cons. So now--no matter how hard I try --when I see a young lady with a tattoo…I am thinking in the back of mind, is she a pirate, a sailor or an ex-con? I don’t get the whole fad, explain please.

Why are girls obsessed with vampires? Vampire books, vampire movies, vampire tv shows. Is there a shortage of guys who haven’t already died and still get up before the sun goes down? I don’t get the fascination with someone who wants to gnaw on your neck and call it petting. Do you still call it petting?

Why are they remaking all the movie, tv shows, and music from my youth? Don’t you guys have any original ideas of your own? You know it is close to the end of the world when there is not one single original idea left.

What is the difference between rap and hip hop? Does one have less cussing than the other? Can you tell me which one that is so I can to listen to it occasionally and pretend I am still cool and “down with it”. Cause I can’t get down with anything  anymore without someone nearby to help me ‘get back up’.

Why do people text me when I am sitting across the room. Do they not want to talk to me in person because I will not let them finish a sentence or  because they are just rude and have no manners?

I would like to have answers asap…you do still use asap (as soon as possible) these days right? And please don’t answer “K”  It is okay or OK ..it is not OKAY to use “k’. Okay?

Signed
Squirrely Girl