SOMEWHERE BETWEEN....

Forgiving and Forgetting...

"Forgiveness is an act of the will in which a person relinquishes any "right" to get even with an offender"~unknown

Did you know that the phrase 'forgive and forget' is not in the bible at all? It talks a lot about forgiving and a lot about forgetting but it never once says ‘forgive and forget’ in the same sentence. Maybe it is a sign that as humans we are not capable of doing both of those things at the same time?  I sure hope so because it is HARD. Have you ever tried to do either one? Then you know it is no piece of cake...(chocolate cake with caramel topping and walnuts and cool whip with chocolate chips topped with ice cream and......... M & M's and.... crushed up Snickers Bars ..yuummmmm ..but I digress.). 

 Oh, it is pretty easy to say, "I forgive you because that is what Christ did for me" but somewhere--deep down inside--if you are completely honest...you know you are saying: ‘Yeah, I forgive you alright...but I can promise you this, I will Never Ever Ever Forget’!!! And maybe that's okay, maybe that is what prevents us from making the same mistakes over and over and over again. Like a built in defense mechanism to protect us from CRAZY!!! Right??

But what does the bible really say about forgiving and forgetting?

 There's a whole bushel full of verses in the bible about forgiveness. Here's your top ten countdown: 

 #1 Because we are sinners we should forgive others

Matthew 6:14-15 

For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.   (uhmmm…that is pretty strong language right there..and uh…I didn’t write it…so…look it up!)

#2 Be ready to forgive over and over again

Matthew 18: 21-22 

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me, up to seven times?” Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven times." (Whoooaaa...seventy times seven ?? Get back Jack..that is a LOT of times ..how many times is that?? Work out the math and get back to me..but I KNOW..it is a BUNCH!!)

#3 Confess and God will forgive you for your sins

1 John 1:9 

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. (Confessing to anything is hard..confessing to being or doing something wrong is harder…I know this ..first hand.)

  

#4 Love will lead to forgiving others

Numbers 14:19-20 

In accordance with your great love, forgive the sin of these people, just as you have pardoned them from the time they left Egypt until now.” The Lord replied, “I have forgiven them, as you asked.” (Love will build a bridge…in the words the Judds or in the words of one of my favorite old gospel song "You're the only bible some people read" )

#5 Priority when it comes to forgiving others

Matthew 5:23-24 

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.” (I might need some guidance on this one…but it pretty much sounds like if we do not forgive those who have hurt us…we can’t expect a whole lot of acceptance from God…so if we are holding a grudge or pouting..we are pretty much separating ourselves from our Heavenly Father..whew..that’s deep) 

#6 Forgive others rather than judge others

John 8:7 

When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” (No commentary necessary) 

#8 Jesus is our Model

Luke 23:33-34 

When they came to a place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals – one on his right, the other on his left, Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” (the mega super duper example) 

#9 Jesus’ command to us

Luke 17:3-4 

So watch yourselves. “If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents forgive him. If he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times comes back to you and says , ‘I repent,’ forgive him.” (There's that math problem again and even more practice for patience, mercy and grace).

  

#10 How to treat enemies

Romans 12:20 

... “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”  (I am soooo not making this stuff up..seriously…check it out. It is right there in Romans 12:20...He said you gotta feed your enemy and give him something to drink. Absolutely nothing...notta...not a single thing about blowing his brains out legally by ‘standing your ground.) 

Now…If you were paying close attention, you will notice that #7 is missing. You know why? Well, I will tell you why...and here it is...

#7 A remarkable example of forgiveness

Acts 7:59-60 

While they were stoning him, Stephen prayed, “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit.” Then he fell on his knees and cried out, “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” When he had said this, he fell asleep.

Stephen was the first known martyr for the Christian faith and he prayed and asked God to please forgive those who were stoning him to death--and then he had peace and ‘fell asleep.’   WOW…double –triple-- quadtriple- -WOW! It was  like he could not let go and leave this world until those who had harmed him …were forgiven.  Take that in for a moment…yes…take a deep breath and let that sink in for a moment or two.  He said “Lord Jesus, receive my spirit…Lord, do not hold this sin against THEM”….against THEM??? That is what Stephen was praying before he was stoned to death?? He didn’t say “look what injustice they have done…Lord I hope you are going to heap a ton of Karma on their head". He did not whine and complain to God about how he was being accused falsely and tortured, he simply prayed a selfless prayer of forgiveness for his enemy-- just as Jesus had prayed, ‘Father, forgive them’ on the cross.

 Stephen was being ‘Christ-like’.  You know …that other word for “Christian”  the one that has nothing to do with your church attendance or numbers or money or who you voted for or did not vote for? Remember that message? The Good News? Being like Jesus, acting like Jesus, encompassing the essence of Jesus? Sharing the message of love and faith, of grace and mercy and of forgiveness and maybe one day, although it seems impossible at times, we might also learn to 'forget'.  Maybe we really can overcome our human nature to recall every wrong done to us or against us by others who wear the same robe of flesh that we wear and realize we ALL make mistakes and at some point we ALL need to be forgiven. 

Jesus was the example..He lived it..He breathed it..He suffered through it…and He taught us the way and yet we still think we know better. We think if someone does us wrong we have every right to do wrong right back. That is certainly not what the bible teaches about Jesus. We think we need more and bigger and better guns to protect us from our enemies. But when Jesus was at risk of losing His life on this earth he told his disciples 'two swords is ENOUGH.' --Luke 22:38 “And they said, Lord, behold, here are two swords. And he said unto them, It is enough!!!)

And when people try to convince me that it is God's will that we go into a war…all I can think about is what Jesus said  --Matthew 26:51-52-- And, behold, one of them which were with Jesus stretched out his hand, and drew his sword, and struck a servant of the high priest's, and smote off his ear. Then said Jesus unto him, Put up again thy sword into his place: for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword".  

I am no theologian or bible scholar..but there is no way to take those strong statements out of context. Jesus' life was on the line..it would have been self-defense and more than qualify for ‘stand your ground.’ He could have called ten thousand angels…he could have have formed a mighty army, he could have done anything he wanted to do…but he came to live among men...as a man..who would face every temptation we faced and would show us how we could overcome without violence. Not only did he sacrifice his life on the cross---because it did not start there and it certainly did not end there---Jesus was teaching us a lesson about how to live, about forgiveness, about putting others before ourselves. It was the ultimate gift of love and the ultimate example of forgiveness.

And what about that whole 'forgetting' thingy...well...here is my favorite verse and I hope this is one of those things we will NEVER forget:

"Brethren, I could not myself yet to have laid hold: but one thing I do--forgetting the things which are behind, and stretching forward to the things which are before."~Philippians 3:13

Stop looking back...you are not going that way..~Squirrely Girl

Love, Life and Hershey's Kisses

I'm in the mood for love...or

Chocolate by any other name....

Valentine's Day is coming. It is right around the corner. A very good friend of mine shared that her church will be having a contemporary service called "The Sweetness of Life" where they celebrate the month of love...and 'chocolate'. I said "count me in"!! Unfortunately I had to leave before the service but the members of the church were ask to share their thoughts on the question, "What is love?"  Since I can share thoughts from just about anywhere thanks to this internet thingy and I cannot get the question out of my mind, I will share them here.

I think everyone who has come within 2 ft of me or read anything I have ever written knows I love me some chocolate. L.O.V.E. love it! I don't know why exactly, there is just something comforting about chocolate and I also read somewhere that there is some sort of caffeine in it too that makes you feel better but too much of it is bad for you. I don't believe everything I read. So I eat chocolate when I feel the need. Moderation in everything I say. (Unless you are really stressed, then throw that saying right  out the window and cuddle up with a bag of Snickers Bars.)

What is love? What does it mean to you? Well-- there is my love of chocolate, something that makes me feel better and there is my love of the Wizard of Oz that gives me illusions of grandeur --then there is another love. If you have lived long enough you have experienced it. It does not always make you feel good. Sometimes it hurts. With love comes caring and emotions and when you really and truly love someone else, if they hurt...you hurt. If they don't love you back..you hurt. If you lose them..you hurt. It is a given that anything that can bring you so much joy will have the same ability to bring you that same level of pain.  From one of my favorites:

"Your joy is your sorrow unmasked. And the selfsame well from which your laughter rises was oftentimes filled with your tears. And how else can it be? The deeper that sorrow carves into your being, the more joy you can contain." ~Kahlil Gibran-The Prophet

And so it goes. The love of a mother for a child, love for a friend, for a husband or wife, for a boyfriend or girlfriend, or for a grandchild. There are some pretty big risks involved there. So why do we keep doing it? Why are we drawn to love? I think because it is necessary to our very being. If we believe God created us in His own image and God is love...then we are love and being 'love' we have no choice but to need to love and be loved. But that doesn't really answer the question of "what IS love?"...I think it is different for every person. 

I think I found out about true love when I was very young. I knew without a doubt that my family loved me unconditionally, so I probably took that for granted. But I really found out about the true meaning of 'love' from my older brother Dwayne. He was the second oldest in our family, born with severe birth defects, he never walked or talked, never took a bite of food that someone did not give him. Never held a spoon or a fork, never placed both twisted feet on the floor, never spoke a clear word and never contributed anything to this world other than 'being Dwayne".  But he touched more people and said more with his eyes, smiles,or frowns than most do or say in a lifetime. 

Dwayne could not change or affect his surroundings, he was dependent on those who loved him and would care for him for everything he needed his entire 24 years of life. If he was hurting from being in one position too long, he could not verbally tell us that...we had to watch him carefully, look at his eyes and see what they were saying. He could make some noises of approval and disapproval but we had to pay close attention to him to make sure he was okay. So I learned to listen...not to words spoken..but to actions.

He loved everyone and always tried to have a smile on his face, but he would get angry just like anyone else. If someone raised their voice, or he thought anyone was being mean to someone else or if an animal was being treated unkindly you could see his eyebrows rise and the look of angst in his eyes that could immediately put an end to any situation. So I learned to speak up when needed and to take up for others no matter what.

There was nothing wrong with Dwayne mentally, he was just trapped in a body that could not do the things he would have loved to do. So he felt all the emotions we felt, the frustrations, the anger and the helplessness. Some people were a little afraid of him and it was hard for them to look at someone who seemed so pitiful, deformed and different. It didn't bother him, he loved everyone because he saw them from a different perspective. So I learned to look at people in a different way and accept them for what they are not what I expect them to be. 

Most people simply 'loved' Dwayne. He could not do a thing for them, he had no money to give, no compliments or flattery, no jokes to make them laugh and not even arms capable of giving them a hug. But they loved him very much. He touched everyone in a special way who took the time to visit with him and they would never forget that experience. He changed lives, without all the words, actions, or theatrics. He changed lives and made an impression through unconditional love. Love that demands nothing in return. Open and honest love without selfish motives. It was love in its purest form. So I have seen 'love' through the eyes of my brother and once you have done that..you can never forget that we are all here to very simply--love one another. 

I am sure Mama Bess and Daddy Frank must have questioned God at some point after Dwayne was born. When he went through 6 months of nothing but severe pain and cries of anguish. But they never mentioned it to us. We thought everyone must have a special brother like our brother. One that reminded you of what true love was every day. So we all learned that every human being has a worth that cannot be measured by what they accomplish in life but by how much they love those around them.

I am so thankful that I was asked once again to remind myself of that kind of love and how very lucky I was to have experienced it at such an early age. When Dwayne passed away, there were tears of sadness but there was also a celebration of his life and my prayer is that the celebration of that simplistic, unselfish and unconditional love will be with all of you--this Valentine's Day and every day.

Love and a bag of Hershey's Kisses to you all~ Squirrely Girl

I

To Everything...Turn Turn Turn..

There Is A Season ..Turn Turn Turn..

And a time to every purpose...under heaven..

 I love the Book of Ecclesiastes and I LOVE that song. I love the way they were able to introduce a powerful message to the world through Rock n Roll. Imagine that.  Pete Seeger took King Solomon's wisdom-- word for word and only added a couple of lines--'turn turn turn" and the ending line --"I swear it's not too late"--- then put it to some music and it became a number one hit for The Byrds in 1969. I love the The Byrds too. (Not to be mistaken for my crazy suicidal kamikaze birds who once ruined a perfectly good hair day and continue to taunt the Ninja Squirrels when they fly into my house or windows ..that is documented in an earlier blog...true story ..really).

My life is about to change and I really needed to hear this song and I needed to read this scripture again. Turn...turn...turn...

A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, a time to reap that which is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up
A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together
A time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing
A time to get, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away
A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak
A time to love, and a time to hate; a time of war, and a time of peace.

I am leaving a job that I love very much, not by choice but because it is time and I am going to a job I love because it is time--and for that I am more than thankful. Some people work an entire lifetime and never find one job they truly love and I have loved several. I once heard some advice that I shared with some young people as a career counselor and decided to take it myself:  'find something you love to do, find a way to get someone to pay you to do it and you will never work another day in your life.'  Hey, I was just lazy enough to take that serious. I can't imagine getting up early each day and going to a job I hate (I can't imagine getting up early PERIOD) but think how miserable I would be if I had to get up early AND go to a job I hated. I would not last long. 

I am only really  good at a couple of things in life--talking and loving people. As long as I can do those two things in some combination, I am always going to be happy. Sometimes I talk through written word or through music or just running my mouth, sometimes I love people the same way. But no matter what or how--every adventure always ends up with me meeting and listening to people who bless me in more ways than I bless them. 

This will be my last blog from the comfort of my old home place for a few months. I am off to have an adventure, back on the road to play a little piano, tell a few jokes, meet some new friends and ...I am just guessing here but....probably talk to a few people. I will keep you updated as we go. It will not always be pretty...it may be a bit shocking at times...but I can promise it will always be honest and probably a little insane. My goal is to taste a different brand of chocolate across America and if I knew how to use my Smarty Pants Phone I would take a pic of it too. Maybe I will have the time now to get to know Mr. Fancy Schmancy Smarty Pants Phone and we can become friends at long last. 

Pray for us on the road, some crazy weather/ drivers out there. Pray for me as I struggle with leaving so many people I love and cherish and last but not least--pray for the Idgets in the band. They haven't heard me complain in quite some time...it will be a shock to their system. See ya on the road and maybe even in your country....let the whining begin!!!

P.S. Just think of all the interesting questions I will get across the nation. You can all help me answer them. Oh what fun we will have and what trouble we will cause! ~Sigh~ Change is good... unless it is a light bulb you can't reach... that is what I always say...

Take Care and go do something you LOVE..."I swear it's not too late"...

Later ~Squirrely Girl~

HAPPY NEW YEAR..LET'S SANG IT!!!

Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot …

Maybe...Maybe Not....

Because I am a song writer (in my illusions of grandeur and a few times by trade) I have always been curious about the song “Auld Lang Syne”. Who wrote it..where did it come from..why do we all sing it every New Year’s and don’t have a clue what we are saying? So... I did a little research that makes me happy and sad.

Sad because the worst thing that can happen to a song writer is for someone to steal your song…or at the very least, steal your lyrics. Music comes pretty natural to most of my family and friends ..those who play instruments can come up with all kinds of fancy licks on a guitar or piano but when it comes to lyrics..those are special..those are words you write straight from your heart and you expose your deepest feelings to the world to be trampled, criticized and condemned. It is not easy..but if you are a writer, you have no choice. You must write. It is as necessary as breathing.

So when I found out the guy who gets credit for a song used worldwide for so many events-- like people passing out drunk on New Year’s Eve-- probably plagiarized the whole thing..it made me sad. Seems old Robert Burns admitted that he took most of the words of the song from old James Watson and  several other ‘poets’ used the same words. I guess ‘copyright infringement’ is not reserved for the 21^st century. I know all this is true because I read it in Wikipedia and we all know Wikipedia would never lie and is completely dependable.  Nobody on the internet lies or makes stuff up or exaggerates anything. Right?  All we really know for sure is that “Auld Lang Syne” means something like ‘for old times’ sake’.The reason the song makes me happy is the next to last chorus that most of us do not sing:

 "We two have paddled in the stream, from morning sun till dine.
 But seas between us broad have roared since auld lang syne."

I don’t know about you folks….but that little chorus right there touched my heart. It speaks of friendship and family ties ..about being there for each other during the toughest times, side by side, through the good times and the bad. It means even if we might one day be separated by miles or even in death, or disagreements--nothing will ever change that love or that friendship. True love does not wane with time or space, it is eterenal. You don’t have to work at it. I love my precious family and friends who love me despite myself. I love that some are just as lazy about our friendship as I am. Some would say we take each other for granted because we don't talk every day or even every year. That is not true. We are so sure of each other’s love that we don’t have to work at it. It never hurts my feelings if they forget a birthday or if they don’t call me for six months. Our love and friendship goes way beyond that. We are so close we can relax and take advantage of each other without ever being worried that someone will get mad.. We all have enough to worry about. We give each other the freedom to not worry and not be perfect. And that is what makes our relationships..perfect!

The reason we can do that is because we TRUST each other. We have nothing to prove to each other. We know each other's weaknesses and strengths, we know at any time or moment if we called each other up ..and said come to me, I need you..no matter how many miles away ...we would be there, either physically or spiritually.. and that is all that matters to us.

There are no perfect families or friendships. We have all let each other down at some point in our lives. And those are the only times that should be "forgotten". That is when we should let the past stay in the past and go forward. Letting go and moving on. Two of the hardest things we will ever do. But one of my favorite stories (and I don’t remember the lesson often enough) is one I found in Reader's Digest years ago when I needed it most. I am too lazy to look up it up on Wikipedia-- but it was the story of the buzzard and the hummingbird and went something like this:

 The buzzard floats on the air currents around him, passively moving with the wind in search of something dead or dying. His whole life is based on looking for the past. He searches for something that was alive but is either dead or dying. His world revolves around the suffering of others and their passing. He only sees the negative things of life and yet he thrives.

The little hummingbird propels himself through the air on his own power and is in constant search for the cactus flower. He seeks out only the sweetest nectar of life in a wasteland. He thrives on beauty and the goodness of his world. He dwells in a positive state of mind. Both are birds yet both have been designed to do what they are meant to do.

Are you a buzzard or a hummingbird?

My wish is that we all bring out more of our ‘hummingbird’ and less of our 'buzzard' this year. And I am going to start by giving old Robert Burns a break on stealing the words of the famous song from old James Watson…James should have got off his butt and turned it into a song himself so stop whining Mr. Watson..you made it into Wikipedia..what else could you possibly want? 

May we all take a cup of kindness yet..for days of Auld Lang Syne…

Happy New Year to all the nuts like me!

~Squirrely Girl 2013

Top Five Things That Broke My Heart In 2012...

Top Five Things That Broke My Heart In 2012..

And How to Prevent Them in 2013

5.  People are not what they seem.

I think we all have images in our minds of how we see people, who we think they are and it hurts when you realize some are just not what you perceived. It burst your little bubble, it is like finding out there is no Santa Clause or Easter Bunny and you just want to know why anyone would lie to you about what is real and what is not! The fact is most of us are not as we appear. I have met people I thought were total buttholes because they acted closed off and aloof and downright unfriendly, but when I took time to get to know them…really know them….I found  out something awful had just happened in their lives. That is why they were acting weird--they didn’t want to meet another person they might love and then have to lose. Then and I have come to know others who I believed in completely and they turned out to be completely whacko. So we have to accept people where they are at the time and not make any pre-conceived opinions or hold on to first impressions. That will save us a heart break or two next year.

4. Religion is not what it seems.

I have decided I am not religious anymore…I don’t think I was ever really religious, I think I have been “Christian” for most of my life because there is nothing any cooler or beyond WOW than Jesus Christ…you just can’t beat His teachings-- so I am happy to say I am no longer religious but a stronger believer in Christ…so that is not what broke my heart. What broke my heart were all the people masquerading as “Christians’ who would kick Christ right out of their own church. Jesus loved everyone. He loved the sinner, the leper, the thief on the cross. He judged no one and just loved them all regardless of their sins. Some Christians had rather go have a Chick-fil-A sandwich in honor of someone who hates homosexuals than give a meal to a child…I guess because it makes them feel superior and separates them from those ‘bad people’. It broke my heart to hear people say or sing in one breath how great the grace and mercy of a loving God is and in the next talk about how He would also send people to a burning hell forever and ever and ever for loving the wrong person or committing a different sin from their sins. My heart broke to not see love come from those that say they love God…but I will continue to love God. Next year I hope I learn to love Him more and serve Him better.

3. NEVER talk about religion and politics.

Sure we have heard that all our lives but because I was raised in the backwoods…I didn’t know any better. Maybe because my parents never agreed on anything political and I learned more listening to them ‘debate’ than any school or college could teach me. I just assumed that everyone was like my family. That you could state your opinion about anything, disagree and then laugh and have a really good home cooked meal later. But that is just not true anymore. People identify themselves by their religious and political beliefs and if you disagree with either,  they feel you are attacking them personally. So my heart did not break because someone did not agree with me…let’s face it..I am pretty used to that….my heart was broken because they thought maybe I liked them less as a person because I did not agree with them. And the bible says if your right hand offends you…cut it off. I don’t think that meant literally take a sword and chop off your hand…I think it means nothing should be more important than letting people know that you love them. 

Certainly not your opinion about anything--even if you feel like it is important-- people will not really listen to you if they don’t think you love them first. My heart is broken by my own mistakes. Now that I realize that--I will be slower to speak and quicker to listen next year.

2. We Have Become a Christian Nation of Fear

Sounds like an oxymoron to me. Christian Fear.  It does not compute. There is a wildfire spreading across the United States of fear. Be afraid of the government, be afraid of your neighbor, afraid of anyone who looks different, acts different, worships different, if they even seem the least bit different. I worship a God who says, “Fear not”, so it all confuses me and I am sure it confuses those who do not know or believe in God. What are we so afraid of? We are ready to put armed guards around our schools, we think more guns will cut down on deaths by guns. We are buying up more and more ammunition getting ready for some sort of show down with somebody and we are teaching our children that the entire world is not a safe place to live. I don’t think the world has ever been a safe place to live. We are enraged at the deaths of 20 innocent babies and we should be but where is the outrage over thousands of deaths of innocent children we killed in wars we should have never been fighting? Do we just demand safety for those children who live within our borders, if and only IF they have a legal right to be here? Jesus came to save the WORLD—not just the USA. That breaks my heart and I am not sure what we can do about that next year. Any and all suggestions are welcomed.

1.      And the NUMBER ONE thing that broke my heart this year is….

I did not spend enough time doing all the things I should have to make things better. I spent more time on “me” than I did on the mission to help others. I thought I had it all right and that all I had to do was make people think like I thought and things would be better. So my heart deserves to be broken into a million little pieces and I need to pick them up and start over. I need to look at the ‘man in the mirror’ or "Ninja Squirrel Queen in the mirror"( hehe)  and start with me.  “Let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me”…that needs to be my motto. I need to stop worrying about what other people are doing or not doing and sweep around my own back porch as Mama Bess would say.

Thank you all for listening to my ranting and raving and craziness this year. I can’t promise I will not continue BUT I can promise I will put forth more effort in the coming year. I will stop…I will pause..I will take a couple of deep breaths, count to 100,000… (maybe) and try to be a bit more understanding and less critical. Ya’ll better PRAY FOR ME…haha

May you all have the bestest New Year EVER!!!

~Squirrely Girl

SEX, DRUGS, AND ROCK N ROLL...and...

.....PYTHONS and EVIL ELVES…

I will be going back out on the road soon with The Hub and The Boys.  Every time I tell someone that they say something like, “Oh, that is exciting!” or “Oh, that sounds like so much fun!”  or “Wow, you guys get paid to dress up and go on stage and play music and have a good time? That is AWESOME!”  But I think what many are thinking is “You are insane, what kind of job is that? That’s not a real job.” or “I bet you all do drugs cause everyone knows people in bands all do drugs, drink and ‘other things’ we can’t even mention.” 

And I completely understand. Growing up in a small town, my impression of ‘musicians and bands’ included: “ They are alcoholic druggies who are too lazy to get a real job and just got lucky and have a little talent in order to get paid enough so they do not have to work a single day in their life. It just can’t be fair that people can love something so much AND be allowed to do it AND get paid for it AND then enjoy it because it is so much fun! That is just not normal and there must be something illegal involved somehow somewhere.”

So when I tell people that our family sometimes plays music for a living and I see their eyes twitch a little, I know where they are coming from. But because of my family’s history in music I was open and even encouraged to explore the possibility that you can make a living using your love of music. Daddy Frank played with Hank Williams Sr. until he said he about starved to death, my great uncles, Pappy Neal and Uncle Earl spent all their lives playing music. Everyone in our family plays an instrument, sings, writes, or at least listens to the radio. You can’t survive if you don’t.  But life on the road is not quite as glamorous as it sounds. I will be doing a blog sharing the ins and outs and break-downs and  a few “Band On The Run/Running On Empty / With The Runs” food critiques..that should be pretty interesting. So stay tune for that. You can check out when and where we will be at The Southern Soul Allstars’ website..  http://www.thessas.com/home.cfm 

I must say ..it is looking like a really COLD ..um..I mean a really COOL tour. Oh well…life is a journey not a destination. And in the case of our band …it is a journey that needs some sort of adult supervision…but why should we start now!!

Speaking of adult supervision…why anyone in their right mind would leave me to my own devices on Facebook is a mystery to me. I have been in more trouble than a tumblin’ tumbleweed in a tornado this week. I chimed in on a little conversation—which I have been known to do a time or two—about the big old humongous PYTHON that was killed in Caryville, Florida. It was of interest to me because I don’t live far from Caryville, Florida. All I said was…people buy those suckers online and then when they get too big and after they eat their house and car..they set them free and then they end up in places like Caryville, Florida…where a little 13 year old girl had to shoot and kill it.

Well…some looney toon guy said I was crazy and that nobody could buy a baby PYTHON online because it was illegal and I said..(because I always have the right to remain silent ..but I never will) “Well here are a few sites that say you can buy one online.”  And he said..”Well the last 3 years that has been banned and it is illegal NOW.”   And I said GOOD! Then he said—PYTHONS can NOT survive our winters here anyway and that I (Ninja Squirrel Queen) did NOT know what I was talking ‘bout and I said—well, the PYTHON in Caryville, Florida that was 11.4 ft long and 15 inches wide..I think it was surviving pretty dang good. And then he got mad and apparently reported me to FB as a black market PYTHON seller/oppressor, which is not true. I am not going to oppress or pet or hunt or buy or sell NO KIND OF SNAKE. 

But that doesn’t matter-- I got put on probation on FB and could not post or like anything on my page for 24 hours until I learned my lesson not to chime in on other people’s conversations that might have looney toon friends. Lesson learned!

At first I thought I was banned for making fun of my nieces’ ‘elf on a shelf”. Yeah…um…who came up with this idea and how many drugs did they take first???  I want a ‘stocking on a shelf’ one filled with as much chocolate as possible but I cannot imagine wanting a little skinny elf on a shelf that gets up in the middle of the night and wrecks havoc on my house, life and family. Who thought this would be fun??? ELVES are Santa’s little helpers. We all know this right??? They are at the North Pole pounding away on toys or trying to be a dentist for God’s sake..they are not roaming around your house playing tricks..that…is GREMLINS!!!  Maybe we can pour water on all those creepy elves and they will turn into FROSTY THE SNOWMAN! That is something I can use around my house because I am having MEGA HOT FLASHES!!!

Sure the title said Sex, Drugs and Rock N Roll..but there will be no talk of sex in this blog. All that leads to is more human beings who think Evil Elves, Pythons and Gremlins are a good thing!

Happy Whatever Will Not Offend You (I am in enough trouble as it is)

~Squirrely Girl

Cousins..who could ask for anything more?

COUSINS MAKE THE BEST FRIENDS and CO-CONSPIRATORS

We all grew up with our cousins. For the longest time I didn’t know the difference between my cousins and my sisters and brothers. We all spent the night together so much I thought we were just one big family who took turns with mamas and daddies. We didn’t just play “musical chairs” we played ‘musical houses’.  The girls would spend all day building a playhouse of boards placed on tin cans to design our ‘house’ under the two big oak trees beside my house appropriately named “The Oak Tree”. If we did skip a night of spending the night together (we didn’t call it sleepovers) the last thing we would say to each other at the end of the day was, “See you in the morning at The Oak Tree!” Then we would take turns walking each other halfway home which could sometimes take hours until we finally figured out we would all have to walk at least halfway home alone..that is usually when we came to the conclusion it would be best if we just spent the night at someone's house. That choice was made by whose mama was cookin' the best supper. 

The Oak Tree was magical. We would build our playhouse all morning and would sweep the dirt and cook our mud pies and we even had some vines in the pretend bathroom and if it had rained that day we would stand under them and shake for a ‘shower’…something none of us had in our real houses. It was a master piece, The Oak Tree. It was our secret club. Which drove the boy cousins completely INSANE. They considered it a foreign country that needed to be attacked and terrorized at every opportunity and they never failed to be creative in their plans for destruction. This often resulted in mind games, like convincing us the place was haunted by a giant monster with a size 24 shoe. That has not been disproved completely to this day. We all saw the shoe print and no one could ever explain how it got there. It was obviously a one legged giant monster because there was only the one footprint, but it was enough to have us screaming and running for safety. Clever they were..the boy cousins”.

Just like in real life, the girls were nesting and building a thing of stability and beauty while the boys were trying to see who could kill each other first on the makeshift obstacle course they had built to use their bicycles as deadly weapons.  JTD,“Jumping The Ditches” was the equivalent of the most extreme sport today. I don’t even know how many bones were broke or dislocated over the years…too many to count..and they DID NOT report most of them because it was against the rules to JTD and the parents would seriously WYB, 'Whip Your Butt" if they found out.  Of course being the wonderful little caretakers and responsible citizens we were, the girls would always immediately report all offenders.

That led to the inevitable and ultimate final battle between the girl cousins and the boy cousins. You could see the smoke coming out of the boy’s ears with thoughts of revenge while we just stayed up all night giggling and preparing for the attack. This would go on forever, until we would all join forces and put our differences aside for the UATE, "Ultimate All Time Experience".  According to the parental units, the most dangerous thing we could do besides go swimming after eating (I don’t know how we all lived through that) was to go play on the DSP "Deadly Sawdust Piles". We grew afraid of three things in life:  panthers, hell and the DSP. The more dangerous they said it was and how bad we would be punished if they found out we played on the DSP, the more we would plot how we could go play on the DSP.

The parental units AND grandparental units would say, “Sure those big sawdust piles look fun, but they are old and they are rotting from the inside out and they will cave in and you will be buried, your lungs filling up with rotted sawdust and you will choke and eventually die a horrible death by suffocation.” And we would say, “Oh yeah, we are DEFINITLY going to the forbidden DSP now!!!!!” 

 I think back and wonder...wasn’t there just one logical older cousin that could have spoke up and said, “Hey, maybe this is not such a good idea”?  Nope, there was not. So we all found a way to play on the DSP at least once a week and some weeks we didn’t get caught and there were no WYB sessions. Good times.

The thing about growing up that close to your cousins is that it last a lifetime. A perfect example is my cousin Dalton and my brother Gator. I wasn't even old enough to remember all the trouble they got into as boys but I know what they are doing now and I am sure it closely resembles their childhood.  The Gator and Dalton have been 'workin' (and I use that term loosely) on and off together since they are both semi-retired and here's a recap of a normal work day for them:

Meet early..the earlier the better...have some coffee and maybe a bite of breakfast..discuss upcoming 'things that need to be done'...have some more coffee...talk a little more about things to be done and decide on one...have some more coffee...discuss other things of great importance..the weather..the neighbors, religion and sin in general and how they could fix it all...have a little something more to eat and a half a cup of coffee...change original thing to be done to something else after re-evaluation of weather and level of arthritis. About 2 hours later..start 'thing to be done'. First stand and discuss 'thing to be done' in great detail and what is actually required to do the job...decide you don't have it...go back.. get more coffee and discuss 'what we gonna do now'? Pick new 'thing to be done'. Go to lunch. Talk with all surrounding patrons at local café about what the new 'thing to be done' and decide if it is truly a priority. Go back have a cup of coffee and discuss new 'thing to be done' and whose opinion from the cafe you really trust and what was the underlying motive for their suggestions.  Decide it is too late to do new thing now and discuss what time to meet in the morning to discuss the new 'thing to be done' in more detail over a cup of coffee.  Decide it needs to be early, the earlier the better. Discuss what happened to the day because it just seemed to fly by.  End the day with the usual farewell greeting, “Meet me at The Oak Tree in the morning."

I love my cousins...say AMEN if you do too!!!

Being Thankful and Confused...

Life and Death…And What Is In The Middle…

We lost another loved one in our family this week. Thanksgiving is tomorrow. My mind is not on turkey and dressing, my mind is not even on the best sweet potato casserole ever made that my sister brings every year or the nanner puddin’ my niece has become famous for or trying to make my dressing taste as good as Mama Bess’ like I do every year. My mind is on the sorrow and pain that comes from that empty chair that will be at a table tomorrow. So I guess my mind is on what Thanksgiving is all about…each other.

 I come from a HUGE family, I mean when God said “be fruitful and multiply” we took that stuff very serious. I love my big family. All the uncles and aunts and cousins and second cousins and third cousins twice removed (whatever the heck that means). All I know is that we are all very close and I would not change a thing. Most of us grew up in the same community and even though many have moved away, we remain very close.  Every place I have worked over the years has said, “Girl, you have more funerals than anyone we know.” And it is true. The advantage to having a big family is there is ALWAYS someone there for you when you need them. The disadvantage is you have more wonderful people that you will eventually lose one day. And it never gets any easier.

Whether we lose one of our beloved matriarchs or patriarchs who lived to be 90 or the sudden death of a young person, there is a void, an emptiness that somehow we fill later with good memories, laughter and peace. But today, I am sad. Today I don’t understand and I want to be a little mad and I want to cry and maybe scream. Today I want to question “why?” Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do children have to hurt? Why do we not know what to say or what to do that might have changed things? I want to ask all the questions and no one judge me or say I don’t have enough faith. I don’t even want all the answers I just want to know it is okay for me to ask “WHY?” Mama Bess always said she would not worship a God that would not let her ask questions and she certainly wouldn’t teach her child to love a God that had an ego so big he couldn’t be ask questions. She said we can bring anything before him …even our questions, even our doubts.  He knows our hearts and he already knows we don’t understand. It is almost an insult to think we can hide our hurt and disappointment from an omnipotent God.

So I will come right out and say it. I am hurt and I am disappointed and I wish I understood it all. I may never understand everything in this life, but I find comfort in the fact I am not afraid to ask the questions. That I feel secure to say, “Dear God…we are all hurting and we don’t understand and we are asking for a peace in our hearts to accept what is and not dwell on what could have been.”

Words lack any power to help anyone’s pain but oh how I wish they did. I would write and talk all the sorrow away. For now all I can do is keep the faith that was instilled in me in as a young child. “Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrew 11:1

We are all born and one day ..we will all die and all that will matter is what we did in the middle. And that is happening now..right now as I type these words and as you read these words. We all have the power to write our own story and determine how that story ends. God be with all those who are struggling today with questions and loss and may we all learn to control our reactions to each chapter in the book of our life. When the time comes...may we all be able to say.."I made the middle count." 

Happy Thanksgiving, peace, love and comfort to everyone!

~Squirrely Girl

How Great Is Our God??? Seriously...how great?

How Great Is Our God?

Sing It With Me….or not…

There has been a whole lot of uproar about traditional music vs. contemporary or “Praise/Worship Music” in churches over the last decade or so. I really don’t care one way or the other as long as you are making a joyful noise to the Lord and mean it. But I must say some of the “Praise/Worship Music” or whatever it is called does repeat the same words a whole bunch of times over and over and over and over and over and…...well you get the point. As a songwriter who fidgets and contemplates every lyric I write, I kind of think that is cheating, but I am  probably just jealous and bitter that I haven’t found the perfect words for a praise phrase to sing over and over and over and over and over and over…..

But I really do like that one song, “How Great Is Our God"

How great is our God, sing with me

How great is our God, and all will see

How great, how great is our God”

You can hear it hear and sing along here…it is a wonderful song. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cKLQ1td3MbE

I love the song because when you sing those words it lets you do what we are suppose to do. Praise his name. Not just ‘worship music’….but assisting in the worship of God. I love that. But let’s say that someone who might not know “our” God. hears us singing about how great he is but they have never experienced his ‘greatness’ yet..they might be a bit confused if they have not yet heard of our God.  The only thing they have to go on is what ‘our’ God does for our everyday life, right? The example of His power in our lives and the lives of others is really the only way they can understand the words of “How Great is Our God" until we have shared the actual  message. 

So after the election when some of the same people I have heard sing that song so passionately have been so angry, sad, disappointed and downright ugly about how the election turned out, I have to wonder…what God were they singing about? I mean if you prayed, as many did, that ‘our’ God’s will be done and it turned out a different way than you thought was ‘His Will”…it means one of two things. Either you didn’t really care about ‘our’ God’s will OR.. ‘our’ God wasn’t powerful enough to rig an election.  And this is why (although I have practically been stoned) I have been saying for a year.... keep “our God” out of “our politics”. Because I can guarantee you not all Christians prayed the same prayer, so at least half of us were going to be disappointed and sometimes we need to thank God for unanswered prayers in the words of Garth Brooks..(or whoever wrote that song).

And another thing…. how great IS our God? Is he not great enough to take us through anything? Did we really need the ‘right political party or human being’ in a place of authority to have faith that God is still in control? Do you really think if one man wants to ‘destroy this country’ he can do it no matter what God wants? How great IS our God?

Have we become so selfish and so elitist that we think we can ‘put in our order’ to God for what we want in this country and he will serve it up like a fast food restaurant? I think God may have looked at the whole hate filled, fear mongering, scare tactics done in his name and said, “These kids need to be put in time out until they can learn to at least pretend to act Christ-like”.  Our mission is to spread the love and mercy of Jesus Christ, not to promote one political ideology over the other. If you can find the words “democrat and republican party” in the bible, please message that to me ASAP. I have got to to see that.

Now I hear there are five states that have started petitions to withdraw from the United States of America. Ooooohhh…kayyyy. Can we help you pack??? Where ya gonna go? And what ya gonna do when ya get there? I heard a bunch might go to Canada..but that can’t be true because they have that HORRIBLE socialist health care system there. I heard a couple who were going to Australia where they have a white Christian President…which is actually a female atheist..but whatever. Or maybe you could go to some of the poorest nations in our world and be a missionary there and see how bad we have it here. I bet things will not look so sad, scary and desperate then. 

From Psalms 146… “Hallelujah! Praise the LORD, O my soul! I will praise the LORD as long as I live; I will sing praises to my God while I have my being. Put not your trust in rulers, nor in any child of earth, for there is no help in them.”

A lot of this madness and fear has been preached from our pulpits..so How GREAT is our God??? Not great enough to handle the problems of America? Not great enough to change the heart and lead any human no matter how much you hate him? How GREAT is our God? If you are singing it with confidence and not fear, if you are singing it with love and the compassion of Christ and not hypocrisy and judgment..then sing it loud and sing it clear and share it from  the top of your lungs. Otherwise, sing it in your sanctuaries quiet and self serving and leave the rest up to our Great God.

May the peace and power of  God be with us all…

~Squirrely Girl

Let's Give 'Em Somethin' To Talk About

And we REALLY need to talk about this...

Dear Squirrely Girl,

Before you read this long, boring, and sometimes sad note, I want to clarify that I am not gay.

And so we begin.

Somebody asked me politely this week the following question, “no offense, but are you gay?” Out of respect of the person who penetrated the awkwardness into my lunchtime, I lightened up the mood by stating, “If I were gay, don’t you think I would dress better?” Obviously that might be stereotypical because I know some gay people who dress just as bad as me, but I digress. I have heard that question, oh I would say, about a 7 times in my life. I actually don’t mind people asking because it does allow me to actually speak for myself as opposed to the whispering lips through the grape vine. It is a question that I have grown to hate and love over the years. I hate it because obviously I speak, act, or move a certain way that give people the impression that I am into men. I love that question because it shows that there are people left in this world who value honesty better than rumors; therefore, this long, boring, and sometimes sad note is not to bash the people who think or ask the question. This is a note that I feel God is calling me to write because there may be someone who is struggling with the same situation . . . or maybe I am writing it because I am bored and refuse to study . . . I think it is a combination of both.

This all started back in middle school. Picture it, January 2004, A small town high school. It’s lunch time and everybody is either eating, walking around outside, or lounging around the entranceway into the building next to the gym. I don’t remember the moments before this incident, all I remember is this tall guy (I would never give names) shoved me out of the way and said the following, “Move you f------g faggot”. Obviously, a chubby little twelve-year-old is not going to stand up to a strong 6’5 junior or senior. Thankfully, I saw a friend (who was a girl) standing nearby so I obviously gravitated toward her. (She was a little older than me so she had a few choice words to say to the foul mouth Neanderthal).

That whole ordeal of calling me a “faggot” is not what upsets me. What upset me so much about that day was a minor detail of that moment that I didn’t mention. See, during lunch we have what we like to call “chaperones” that usually consist of school personnel. On that day, two of them witnessed this little episode. After witnessing this little (and yes, in the grand scheme of worldwide bullying, I would consider a little bump and name calling to be ranked kinda low on the bully spectrum) incident, the words that stick with me to this day were spoken from the lips of one them, “if you’re going to have girls sticking up for you then you might as well be one [faggot].”

Again, this long, boring, and sometimes sad note is not to bash the outspoken school personnel or their silent companion. In my heart I have forgiven the harsh words, the bully, and the two in authority. But since that moment, I know that obviously there is a reason why God made me . . . well . . . not so John Wayne-ish.

You see, I see people constantly bash others who are different, and since we are on the subject of homosexuality I might as well use it for example. We have all seen news segments about teenagers committing suicide because they were bullied. I can hardly listen without my blood boiling and my heart breaking. I am ashamed to say that I have also bullied gay people. Whether it was by physical words or in my heart, I had judged and condemned homosexuals for no purpose other than to mask or somehow justify the sins and struggles I hide in my own closet so to speak. 
(I swear this long, boring, and sometimes sad note gets to a point) 

The point is (told you) WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT DAMMIT!!!!

Nobody is perfect! Nobody is cookie-cutter. Nobody without the grace and forgiveness of Christ is worthy to even clean the golden rimmed toilets of Heaven. 
I say all of that to say this. If any of you are going through Hell every day at school, work, or home . . . talk to me. I’m no Oprah, but I’ve been there. I’ve been there when grown, educated adults who not only fail to protect you, but push the thorn even deeper in your side. I’ve been through it all (ok not all, but sometimes you have to say that in order to make a point). . .but I didn’t do it alone. Thankfully, shortly after that incident I had the opportunity to have a quiet time with God for me to just vent.(and yes, I vented while sitting on a toilet seat. . . get over it). I didn’t know if I was going to move schools, rob a candy store, or sacrifice a puppy. I just knew that whatever I did, I needed to talk with Him first. Thankfully, in my heart He told me to push through and continue on, and so I did.

I finished school, I moved on, and BOOM! I run into this guy at Walmart. He didn’t even recognize me. (Go figure). I hate to mention karma or any Adele type scenario, but between you and me, he is not sporting the same body he had in high school. . . or hair . . . or teeth. And the school personnel.... I don’t hold anything against them. I can come up with a bunch of excuses and explanations for what they did. . . and at this point in my life I don’t care. I am glad that event occurred. Now when I am faced with the temptation to judge, condemn, or bully somebody, I can picture in my mind those two ladies and pray on the spot that I don’t repeat what happened in that school house.

Ok, maybe this long, boring, and sometimes sad note doesn’t really have a point, a plot, or a message. . . but it’s just what’s on my heart at the moment. 
To truthfully answer the girls question, no I am not gay. I don’t support homosexuality, but I also don’t support, adultery, fortification, lying, drinking, pride, or any of the 667 sins listed athttp://www.wogim.org/sinlist.htm 

But I do support the people behind each and every sin because in today’s world we cannot rely on teachers, adults, or even families sometimes for protection. We need God. And when someone doesn’t know God personally, that is where we come in. 
That is the end of today’s lesson. 

Squirrelly Girl, do with it what you like.

Keaton

Dear Keaton,

Well the first thing I would like to do with this is go kick some adults’ ignorant beeeehinnnds..but since you are being so forgiving and insightful about the whole thing and have so much more maturity now than they will have when they are 103 years old, I will contain my need for violence and the satisfaction of making them feel as helpless as you did back then because you are right….we have to accept people where they are. Maybe they really were too immature, uneducated and untrained to be teachers and hopefully have learned some lessons since then.  

And what I learned also from your “long boring, and sometimes sad note” (which was not long, certainly not boring and really not sad…and I will tell you why later) is that the kid who bullied you probably grew up being bullied and more than likely from his own family and his only defense was to strike out at someone he considered weaker than him. He wanted someone else to feel what he was feeling. Sometimes when people feel the need to intentionally hurt and abuse someone else they are not just evil (there are plenty of those too I am sad to say) but they just want someone else to feel as bad as they do. And it worked didn’t it? You had a glimpse into a little bit of the pain that comes with not truly being loved. I am so thankful to know for a fact that you had enough unconditional love in your life to recover from that temporary pain. The saddest thing about your letter is that you and I both know there are so many who do not have that support and when they face being bullied every day, they do feel worthless and see no reason to continue.

Suicide is the third leading cause of death for young people and bullying victims are 2 to 9 times more likely to commit suicide. http://www.bullyingstatistics.org/content/bullying-and-suicide.html THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE!

I wish I knew the answer but I think you just made a very good start. I think people who have been bullied have to share what that feels like, they have to make themselves available to those going through a similar events so they do not feel so alone. Teachers and anyone else in a position of authority must be trained to deal with these situations and be easily approached without fear of being bullied further.

In plain language: If you are being bullied tell someone ANYONE. Feel free to message me and if you would like to talk with Keaton I will get you in contact with him. If you are a teacher or principle, any adult that deals with young people and you do not feel comfortable dealing with bullying or have never received proper training in how to deal with these situations and you never want to read this type of story about yourself. Please we beg you, let someone know.. seek out resources to assist you. Do not let your pride stand in the way of not knowing the best way to deal with a bully. Some child’s life may very well depend upon your actions.

Keaton, my precious nephew, as far as people asking you if you are gay…from now on just say something like this… “Can I ask you  about your sex life, like who, when and what and how many?  Oh, I can’t. Yeah that would be rude wouldn’t it?  Good, glad you agree… that means it shouldn’t really matter now should it?” Cause they are idiots and it doesn’t matter what they think.

So your note was not sad at all because it opens doors to the unspoken problems many young people find themselves in today and you have just proved that no matter what…they too can overcome the stupidity of others.

With Much Respect and Love and Gratitude to You

~Squirrely Girl